I can't help but feel heavy, a little lost, confused on a level I can't quite put my finger on but still the Universe feels like it's pulling at me. Calling me in one direction or another. The warm feeling that bleeds out through my heart and into my life is strong but still I am slowly, methodically, sifting through pieces of my life figuring out what I need to keep and what I need to let go of. I know this feeling and I've gone through it many times before. This is not a time to shut down and plough through, this is a time when I need to actively figure out what I need to do to be more emotionally and mindfully present. What I am experiencing is the labour pains of change. Even if something it going to dramatically shift your life in a positive direction you are still going to have to go through some form of this. If you are aware enough to know what's happening it will pass more quickly, if not, then you will find yourself wandering around your life not knowing entirely what is happening. Sound familiar? This “birthing” process of a new self takes time and it's inevitable that you will go through it sooner or later. There is a moment when who you are has to actively and consciously let go of who you were and that moment is always a mixed bag.
Identity is a wonderful thing although you may have noticed a lot of people seem to take it far too seriously. What you are is not who you are and it's the blurring of those lines that leaves so many in that lost space. If you define yourself by your actions, by what you do, what you earn, your job title then what happens if that is taken away? If I had a bump on the head and could suddenly no longer write how would that change me? Would I be a totally different person afterwards? I hope not. I would like to think that I would just gravitate towards something of equal or more merit. If I suddenly lost my psychic ability I wouldn't be any less inquisitive about the world. I wouldn't find people any less fascinating. I would still find a deep pleasure in watching people evolve into their happiest selves. Don't get me wrong it would suck and I would grieve the skill set but I would find another. Identity when it does not acknowledge the soul is a recipie for disaster. I'm not saying that you should abandon any affinity for the physical self, after all, playing in that arena is one of the many reasons we incarnated in the first place but also acknowledge that you are one of many. Even within the frame of your own body you are already a collaboration more than you are a single entity.
You are always on the road to becoming a bigger and brighter version of yourself. That is a given for the human experience. The only real choice we seem to have is whether we go willingly towards that expression of self or not. It is tricky to navigate sometimes because we will inevitably attach some parts of who we are to our physical experience. That in and of itself is not a bad thing. When utilised properly we all have the capacity not to just improve our own lives but through the clarity of example we can change the world around us. So if you find yourself in a slump that feels nameless then maybe you are just in the process of growing into a new phaze of you. Maybe life isn't tasteless, perhaps it's just creating a new flavour that you havent' quite reached for yet because you didn't realise that's what was happening? As always be gentle with your growth and see where it takes you. Let your intuition be your guide and remember that the Universe is always working towards what is best for the greater good which always includes YOUR greater good.
Thank you for reading,
Ryan James x